Hell has haunted me since childhood…
I knew there was evil out there somewhere, that it wanted me, and so I bargained with it. “You cannot attack me unless I am in the midst of forty other Christians.” How I thought I had some ability to make demands upon an unseen and malevolent force I have no idea – but to the mind of a small child, it makes sense.
Hell has haunted me in adolescence…
I was returning from a field stone masonry job in Windham (NY) and I took a wrong turn and was lost (before the days of GPS). I turned around in a driveway – but woe to me, the driveway was on a sharp incline and as I pulled out my wheels squealed and gravel flew.
I drove home – a good 45 minutes away – but for the rest of the day the nagging feeling that I had committed a ‘sin’ against the owner of that property haunted me. Eventually I caved and put a rake in the back of the car and returned to the driveway. I got out with my rake and couldn’t tell that anything had been disturbed. Conscience relieved, I returned home.
Hell has traveled with me throughout adulthood…
I suppose if there is one thing I can say – it is that hell has been a faithful companion – never far from my door, always ready to pounce on me in some new form.
“You are either going into a trial…going through a trial…or coming out of a trial.” Someone said. What if you are always going through a trial – and sometimes you just get to be going into/through/coming out of a second and third and fourth one at the same time?