God, You Are So Hard to Get!

You who live in heaven Hear the prayers of those of us who live on earth Who are afraid of being left by those we love And who get hardened by the hurt Do you remember when You live down here where we all scrape To find the faith to… Continue reading

It Isn’t Anything New.

Trying to process life and reading through some old journal entries…This is what it is like when the OCD/scrupulosity is pretty bad and is from February 11th, 2002 – over ten years ago. I would have just turned 18 in January. Crap! I hate my life. Why must I always… Continue reading

Why It Is So Hard

It seems that the majority of individuals experience a baseline of peace in their lives which is intermittently punctured by tragic loss. I experience a baseline of pain with infrequent spikes of peace and intermittent punctures of tragic loss. This makes the tragic losses that much more difficult to survive.… Continue reading

Day 1 – Fisher Wallace CES Journal.

I received my Fisher Wallace Cranial Electrotherapy Stimulator yesterday afternoon in the mail. I utilized it in the evening and now today (Thursday, July 11th) is my first full day utilizing the stimulator. I’m going to try and keep detailed records of my experiences, especially regarding my mood and any… Continue reading

In the Depths of Torment.

Introduction Tonight I went back and read through some early journals I had written. In some ways I am a very different person from who I was then, in some ways I am very much the same. I came across this particular entry which I wanted to share…I think it… Continue reading